Laugh Free Situation

This weekend i found myself in the quaint town of Moscow Idaho (pronounced Moscoe), in case you were wondering. A co-worker and i headed out there early Friday to visit with a former co-worker and her hubby. I didn't really know what to expect once we got there. My only experience with any relation to Idaho was this trashy lass i met when living on the east coast, Jenny Idaho. She was indeed. . .a hoe. I don't throw that word around loosely so you know i really mean it. On with the meat (ironic choice of words seeing as we were visiting veggies).

We rolled into Moscow after a pretty uneventful 6 hour ride. We had stopped off in Walla Walla Washington for a quick lunch. My co-pilot and i walked into what looked like a classy coffee shop/cafe. Once we were seated we found the atmosphere to be more like a feline serving Chinese restaurant than a coffee shop. The place was strange to say the least. As you entered the joint you were welcomed by a nicely appointed, wood floored coffee shop. As we ventured further back. . .the place got worse. It went from coffee shop, to low brown diner, to feline serving Chinese family restaurant. The food matched the decor. I opted for a bowl of "Boston Clam Chowder," which was more like heated clam sauce in a bowl with corn, and the ever-so heart healthy BLT. I must give credit where credit is due. . .the BLT wasn't bad but then again. . .who can screw up a BLT? I'll leave out the drink confusion that took place between the waitress and i.

Just one of the delicous items available at the coffee shop.

After an impromptu tour of downtown Moscow we briefly met up with Stacie and Austin before they had to leave for their concert in Spokane. Left to our own devices Kristie and i ventured back into downtown Moscow for libations, food and entertainment. We found ourselves at a place called Mingles. Mingles is a billiards joint that just so happened to be filled with an assortment of other gems. One of these said gems was the untouched shuffleboard table tucked away in a dark corner. I seem to have a nose for shuffleboard like an old person does for pancake breakfasts. We got ourselves some pucks and started chucking away. The table was long and concaved, which made us look a lot better than we are. We even caught the attention of an older gentleman (probably looking for a pancake breakfast) walking past the bar. After a few beverages it was unclear as to who was the victor, in the end it didn't really matter. Another morsel of pleasure Mingles offered was the 60 inch big screen tv, featuring, not basketball or football but fishing. They didn't have just any ol' fishing on display, they were showing cat fishing. Only the finest for our viewing pleasure. The last and quite possibly the finest gem found at Mingles was in the bathroom. Now. . .everyone would expect a condom dispenser in the bathroom, that's common place in a spot like Mingles. But Mingles took class to a whole new level. They had a fragrance machine in the bathroom, with "Brut "like fragrance," Jovan Musk Oil "like fragrance," and of course, not to be left out. . .Aramis "like fragrance." We desperately wanted to take a video of me saucing it up but waited too long and the bathroom got filled with sausage. Apparently the women's room sported a similar feature, only different "like fragrances."

We left Mingles in search for greener pastures but found ourselves wandering around downtown Moscow, taking pictures of storefronts and talking to the local "beat" cops about sticky buns and delis. As the night drew to a close, at 9pm because we're old, it was back to the truck. This trip i was particularly blessed. Instead of sleeping on the side of the road or in a dark parking lot, i had a room with a bed. Life was good.

A shot of the Mingles logo on the shuffle board.

Somebody decided to dump their wine on the table.

And then tried to suck it up with a straw.

and when the head rush got to be too powerful. . .we went for the gutter method of collection.

Here is the stink box from the men's room. I really like the rust in the Jovan Musk Oil "like fragrance" jet.

Saturday we woke up to drizzle and heavy fog. After a delicious breakfast feast we hopped in the car and headed up to Step Toe Butte for a view of the Palousse. Late fall isn't the best time to view the Palousse but it was pretty impressive either way. I took a few pictures but justice was not done. Crappy light and poor skill kept the pictures from coming out as good as the view itself. The rest of Saturday was spent relaxing at home, manging on some tasty mac n' cheese and more relaxing. Sunday morning we headed out for breakfast on the town and people watching only to be foiled by parents weekend and long lines. The trip was nice and it was good to see Stacie and Austin. We we lucky enough to be around the weekend they discovered the sex of their child. I still didn't think the occasion warranted Stacie drinking all that whiskey and pop all those pills but who am i to judge?

A view of the Palousse from atop Step Toe Butte.

I stopped for a potty break along side of this grove of trees. The grove stretched for a few miles along the side of the highway. Each row seemed to be planted in a perfect line.

Visitor From the East

Many of you may already know but Willy came out for a week long visit in early July. His trip, unlike many other trips to Stumptown, came with a packed agenda. Willy has the advantage of being a veteran traveler to Portland so less time is spent in the city and more is spent out and about. For his trip this year we were adventure bound and heading southward. Not that there isn't enough adventure to be had in Portland but watching smelly hippies play Frisbee along the waterfront but it was not part of our master plan, not this time.

Willy got into Portland (hassle free for the first time) on Thursday the 3rd. We took it easy the first night and let him settle into the Portland attitude. The next morning we headed up to the mountain in search of glacial trails and mountainous views. Our plans were altered by low lying clouds and a washed out trail. We switched our route and headed into the gorge for a stroll along the famous Eagle Creek Trail. Still taking it easy we opted for the 4-mile loop that turned around at Punch Bowl Falls. The trail is known for it's narrow trail that winds allow the canyon walls created by Eagle Creek. Before getting to Punch Bowl Falls we took a side trail to view Metlako Falls.

The infamous Eagle Creek Trail.

Willy about to snap a photo of Metlako falls.

Punchbowl Falls from a hidden side trail scramble.

When we got back to town it was time for an afternoon nap before the real festivities began. We had a little shindig at the house to celebrate the independence of our beloved country. What better way to do that than with some saw horses and a sheet of plywood, let's not forget the plastic "keg" cups and cheap beer. That's right. . .to celebrate the creation of our country we played Beer Pong. Willy and i were victorious over the beer pong vets. Actually, the victory really goes to Willy as i did very little to contribute to demise of our opponents. I did, however, drink plenty of Pabst Blue Ribbon. The evening rounded out with a patriotic display of illegal fireworks in the street. My neighbor was kind enough to donate some mortars to our cause. It was a nice display of our love for mother America.

Keg kup karnage.

The real adventure began Sunday morning when we started toward Crater Lake, Oregon's only National Park. Yes. . .you read correctly. . .Oregon's only National Park. Hard to believe i know but when your state does a good enough job of protecting it's land, the feds don't need to step in an protect it for you. On our way southward we stopped off in Bend to grab some nourishment, a pint, and stretch our legs. After a walk along the Deschuttes river it was back into the truck and on the road. The two campgrounds within the park were both closed due to snow so we settled in at Diamond Lake. The campground was pretty empty. We grabbed a spot along K-loop and pitched camp under the looming view of Mt Baxter (or something like that). The lakeside site was nice but the it came with the usual lake side annoyances. The gnats were so plentiful that you could hardly see through their swarms and regardless of what any of my exes may say, the mosquitoes found me to be sweet. After settling into camp it was time for some libations, great conversation and in the end. . .sleep, precious sleep.

Willy's home for the week.

My lovely abode for the week.

(little) Bigfoot sighting

The next morning we toasted up some bagels on the Coleman and started the 20 minute drive down to Crate Lake. The drive to the lake offered a variety of landscapes, from pumice deserts to snow topped peaks. As we started up the rim drive i was struck square in the face with what felt like a bat. It's amazing how the 7th deepest lake in the world can sneak up on you while you're driving. When the lake suddenly came into view like a. . .turkey flying into the side of a truck. . .i nearly drove the two of us to our deaths. The view is something pictures will never even begin to display but i make my feeble attempts below. We didn't make it down to the boat launch that provides people with an opportunity to hike Wizard Island because the entire east side of the rim drive was still under snow. We still managed to get a couple solid views of the lake though.

Crater Lake and Wizard Island.

Ditto.

After a two day stint with the bugs and the beautiful views of Diamond Lake it was time to head west and into the Umpqua National Forest. Our destination was Horseshoe Bend Campground, which is situated along the banks of the North branch of the Umpqua. . .it was time for some rafting. We got into camp pretty early and decided to just settle into our new home away from home. We met our raft guides our first night and one joined us later in the evening for some farkel (dice, similar to squelch for those of you who are familiar with it) and switch (an incredibly card game similar to Uno, which was handed down to me by an irishman). The next morning we hopped in the van with the guides and headed down to the boat launch. Our first day on the river we were accompanied by a family of three from San Diego. They were cool enough folks and kept the conversation going and the water flying, when necessary. The other boat in our party was filled with a bachelor party. The boys were rowdy and useless. At one point one of the fellas tackled their guide and took her into the river with him, leaving the rest of the group to fend for themselves. Lucky for the guide, they were apparently scared to get their paddles wet, so they didn't get very far. Lucky for us. . .they were the other group on the overnight trip, so we were stuck with the for the night and another day.

Safety first.

A random rapid along the North Umpqua.

Looking back to check in on the slacker bachelor boat.

After a long day on the river our guides cooked up some cedar planked salmon, redskin mashed potatoes, garlic bread and some peach cobbler fresh out of the dutch oven. Dinner was delicious and our rowdy bachelor party companions provided plenty of entertainment. We stayed up late partying with the bachelors and guides. We threw down some more farkel and switch and drank our share of boxed wine (at least i did). The next day it was back to the river. There were two other boats scheduled to head down the river with us. Our counterparts for day two were a wedding party and the bachelors. Hoping to avoid a day in the boat with the rowdies we begged and pleaded with our guides to break up the wedding party. Our efforts were lost and we were bachelor boat bound. Something must have gotten into them (besides boxed wine and watered down beer), because they paddled their drunken, meat-headed hearts out, at least until lunch. After lunch the river was pretty tame and the antics began. We rodeoed our boats (someone stands on the front or back of the boat and tries to keep their balance as everyone else in the boat sporadically spins the boat in different directions) and tortured the wedding boats. The wedding boats didn't have much in the way of personality (later to find out that one of them was from Maryland, psht). It could have been because we incessantly doused the groom with buckets full of water and knocked the bride off her tube with another bucketful. Although the North Umpqua River isn't thrashing with whitewater (it boasts more rapids per mile than any other river in Oregon), it make for a beautiful trip along some of Oregon's pristine national forests.

Group photo with the bachelors.

I think it's the same random rapid. You be the judge.

We headed back to Portland Friday morning. The trip was uneventful. Once we got back into the town we headed over to Apizza Scholls for some the best pie known to man. Tired from the week's excursions, we called it a night. The next morning we had an early wake up call for Willy's flight back east. All in all it was a great trip. Living so far from family really makes you appreciate the time you do get with family. It certainly doesn't hurt when it gives you reason to gallivant around Oregon too.

There will be more pics posted from this trip. My little 256 memory card could only handle so much beauty. Willy will be sending me some of the stuff he shot during our adventures. I'll post them when they make their way out west. Ta ta for now.

Patience? What Patience?

If anyone has ever told you that it takes patience to learn a something new. . .they are a lying s.o.b. I am making great progress in my desire to learn to ski. And just look how little patience i have! This video and several of the photos listed in this post are proudly brought to you by the hands and eyes of Charles R. W. , aka Deputy Picaboo. Thankfully, his digital equipment does not record sound so we can keep this blog safe for all viewers, even Fiona.

Ryan flew into stumptown Valetine's night and we've been destroying Mt. Hood ever since. The weather deities unleashed the sirens for his visit. Uncommon to PDX this time of year, the skies were clear, the rains ceased and the temp even raised a bit. And. . .today is your lucky day, i'm not in the mood to write, so all you're going to get out of me are pics and captions. Here you go. . . enjoy!

But first. . .some words of caution.Couldn't have said it better myself, "You or your heirs."

So Ryan helped me figure out why i have such a hard time reading maps. It's upside down, stupid!

Here's Ryan trying to make some folks jealous. Ahh, what did we do with ourselves before the camera phone?

I think it's safe to say that we've had a few inches of snow this year. You can see it piling up to the third story of Timberline lodge.

This is only one of many reasons for hitting the mountain on a clear day. That's Mt. Jefferson in the distance. More to come.

Here i am skiing back down to the tree line. Just part of the 1 1/2 mile run we attacked all day.

Here's Ryan trying to keep momentum along the flat lands. All the more reason to ski, poles seem to help in these situations.

No good deed is left unpunished. This is what he gets for all his efforts.

From the top there is only one direction to take. . .it's that way.

Here's the camera man du jour preparing for another downhill photo shoot.

Check out the technique. Not bad for only my 3rd day on the hill.

Some more action shots of Brody doing some serious shredding.

It's pretty easy to get caught up in trying to find the meaning of life. . .i think we found it this weekend.

After a hearty lunch in the lodge the clouds tried to punish our beloved mountain. Everyone was a winner.

Catherine joined us on our 2nd and even more spectacular day. The snow was just right, soft, fast and plentiful.

The mountain rats take a break for some tasty grocery store sandwiches, kettle chips and pop (yes, i said pop).

"Dear Video Diary, Day Two, Portland Oregon. . ."

On our way home my "patience" paid off again. Too antsy to sit in the typical Mt. Hood downhill traffic jam, we took the "long" way around the backside of the mountain. After a quick pit stop in Hood River for some replenishing goodies, we headed back through the Columbia River Gorge and into Portland. No trip through the gorge is complete without a stop at Multnomah Falls. We jumped out to strecth our legs and let Ryan shutter shake off some of its dust.

Vital statistics.

The low light give the picutres a "dreamy" look, according to the photagrapher. I would have to agree.

A whispy shot of the lower falls.

As the cliche states, "All good things must come to an end." And so this trip did, although our successes on the mountain made it very tempting to spend the sabath celebrating the great weather and spirits.

I hope this post finds you all green with envy. If i were you i would be. Although i lock my door every morning when i leave and before i go to bed each night, it's always open. Bring your wax, boots, hat, shorts, gloves, sleeping bag, and of course. . .your camera.